Tuesday

Condoms: My body = My decision

I don’t like condoms. I probably hate them more than most guys do.

I like to let things happen naturally when I have sex. I like to be spontaneous.
You can’t be spontaneous when you have to stop what you’re doing, find a condom, get it open (tough to do if you’ve already played with the lube), put it on and get back to where you left off.

Then I have to hope that the guy doesn’t lose his wood while we were doing all that. There are also guys that can’t get it up and keep it up with a condom on.

I hate condoms even more because they deprive me of something I love dearly. I enjoy the feeling of a man ejaculating inside me. It turns a good fuck into a great fuck. It makes a great fuck an incredible fuck. It makes fucking more satisfying and more everything. I even enjoy the feeling of having cum inside me. Maybe it’s a woman thing, maybe it’s my thing. I’m not sure.

I love all that. And I hate condoms.

But sometimes, most of the time, I use them. To be sure, I don’t use always use them. When I first started seeing other men I almost always did. That was the agreement I had with my husband. Over time there were some men who I didn’t use them for one reason or another. Now I have become what I probably would call a selective condom user, but it’s still more often than not.

If a lover is recently divorced or I feel reasonably confident about his background and sexual history I may consider sex without a condom. If I’ve been seeing someone for a long time I sometimes will switch to sex without a condom. That’s one reason I prefer long-term lovers; knowing them well enough to be able to go bareback, if I choose.

But if I don’t know anything about a guy, then we will use a condom. If he is new, or someone from out of town I see occasionally, then we will use a condom.

It's tough to say for sure how I will feel, who will use one and who will not.

There is only one rule and it is this – I decide who will use a condom and who will not. It’s my body. I have children and a husband. As much as I may want to fuck someone bareback I will not risk everything blindly. I will use reasonable caution, and I and only I decide what’s reasonable.

If the guy has a problem with my decision then I don’t want to have sex with him. That means he doesn’t respect my opinion or me. I don’t want to be with anyone who doesn’t respect me.

If a guy wants to be with me badly enough with no condom, then he can go get a blood test and bring me proof that he’s clean. If he’s willing to work that hard for it, then I’ll probably be impressed enough to give him what he wants.

Everyone else has to leave it up to me. I may. I may not. But I’m the only one who decides.