That's how I live now, and that's why I have other men in my life. As much as I love my husband, I realized I am happier and more fulfilled as a woman if I have different men in my life.
My husband has my heart, and no man can or will ever replace him. I love him completely. I love him even more for accepting me for who I am.
The other men in my life are lovers. They can never have my heart. But almost everything else I am, and everything else I have, can be available to the right man.
Each man is different. The chemistry between us is always different. Some of them have been sweet and tender lovers. Some have been direct and matter of fact. Others have been a little more aggressive and took what they want. They're my favorites.
I like real men. I like men to look like men and smell like men and act like men. I like men who know what they want. I like it when a man pursues me for a sexual relationship. When we're together I like it when a man goes for it and takes what he wants.
Men like that make me feel female and subservient. It excites me when they get passionate. With some men I get a sense that things could get out of control (my control). I like that sensation even if it is a little scary. Scary can be exciting.
I've never been with anyone who wasn't respectful and considerate, but sometimes I think it would be exciting to find a man who wasn't so considerate. I wouldn't complain if I found a guy who took charge when we met and took what he wanted.
I wouldn't mind having my clothes ripped off by someone who needed me now (I can sew the buttons back on later). I wouldn't object if a lover pushed me back, forced himself between my legs and just did me like a whore. He could even get a rough or spank me or slap my face as he fucked me hard. A man like that could have me anytime he wanted me.
I like to think about that. I like to think about finding a lover like that.
Whatever happened to the Marlboro Man? Where would I find his younger brother?