Wednesday

A different kind of blind date

We've all been on blind dates. Do they ever turn out well, by the way?

I'm going to tell you about a different kind of blind date. This one definitely is more predictable and usually a lot more fun than the kind of blind date we all know and hate!


If you're a woman and you read this blog regularly, then it's safe to say you fuck around like me (or you think about it).

I enjoy having lovers in my life, in my bed, on the side, whatever. But it's not always possible to be with someone. I'm not always dating someone. They're not always available. Sometimes life just gets in the way. When that happens I don't stop having great sex. I just have to be more creative, and that usually involves my husband (contrary to some of my blogs I still love fucking him!).

Years ago we tried something that we still do, usually when I can't find the time (or the right guy) for the real thing. We call it a "Blind Date". It's really a sensory deprivation experience masquerading as a sex act, but don't rule it out. It's hotter than you might think and (to me) a satisfying way to get along until my next real date.

I love to fantasize. I do it more than most women, and probably more than some men. I didn't always fantasize. But once I began to do it I found I liked it. The more I liked it the more I did it. Soon it began to help my sex life and partly because of fantasies I ended up in this lifestyle and fucking other men.

When I can't see others, I fantasize more often. Here's one way to take your fantasies to a new level. Fantasies are in our minds (obviously). But they often get clouded with input from everyday life. I found that if you can block out your everyday life then your mind can better focus on your fantasy.

How? Think blindfolds and earplugs! Sight and sounds are our largest senses. Take them away and you won't have as much distraction. You can think more clearly and you can fantasize better.


Here are the basics for a Blind Date:

1. The wife is blindfolded where she cannot see anything, even out of the sides. Cotton pads on my eyes work best, held in place by a blindfold and maybe a scarf on top of that too, to keep anything from slipping off. NO peeking. That ruins everything instantly!


2. Ear plugs! Use good earplugs. CVS sells a good quality, soft, moldable wax earplug. Sensory deprivation is important to allow the woman to focus ONLY on her fantasies. She shouldn't be able to hear anyone or anything at all. Any sound intrudes into her fantasy.

3. The husband leaves the bedroom. The wife is on the bed naked, or wearing a negligee she would want to wear for a lover. She begins to pleasure herself to get things going. It's important that she pushes ALL thoughts of her husband OUT of her mind, and allows herself to think ONLY of her fantasy lover. She is NOT even married in her mind. ALL of her thoughts are as if she was with that lover at that moment. (It takes some mental discipline)

4. The husband stays out of the room for a sufficient time for the wife to get aroused and be totally into her fantasy. 20-30 minutes is usually right for me. But this is QUALITY alone time for the wife. It’s all about her and her thoughts. She needs to be in her own world and absorbed in her fantasy completely by the time the husband comes back in.

5. Position is critical. The wife must be COMFORTABLE and ACCESSIBLE. The husband MUST be able to have access to her sex and be able to enter her with a minimum of effort and a minimum of “signaling” (soft mattresses signal movement, firmer surfaces do not). For some, laying back naked and spread legged on the edge of the bed works. Doggy on the edge of the bed or chair (or even on the floor) works well for others. Regardless of position, the wife should be spread wide, very wet, and very aroused. In her mind she should have been through the foreplay part of lovemaking with her fantasy lover, and ready for "him" to fuck her (enter the husband as surrogate). Have extra lube on hand to insure that initial penetration is very pleasurable.

6. NO talking by the husband! He must do NOTHING that would interrupt the wife’s fantasizing about someone else. This is about the WIFE. SHE is the ONLY one who talks. However, she only “talks” to her fantasy lover, calling out HIS name, etc. For the Blind Date to work the best, she must FORGET her husband and BELIEVE that her fantasy lover is present. Scream out his name. Beg him to fuck you. Whatever you would really say and do with him.

7. When the wife is ready (after 20-30 minutes) the husband comes in SILENTLY and enjoys the sight of his wife masturbating and aroused by thoughts of another man. Since the wife cannot see or hear she has no idea she is no longer alone. Minimal foreplay is called for. NO kissing (it’s a giveaway). The husband should play with her just a little. Groping her breasts, clit massage, pussy fingering works well, just not a lot of touching places that don't need touching, and not too much of it. After all the wife knows the husbands touch, and that can ruin the fantasy.

8. Intercourse – The wife should be TOTALLY into her fantasy lover by now. NO thought of her husband should be in her mind at all. When he enters her, she should 100% imagine it is her lover, even telling “him” to fuck her, and calling out “his” name when she orgasms. Women – Give feedback. Respond to your “lover” as you would in person with him. Doing so WILL make it more real for you. If done right it can almost be so realistic it will seem UNREAL! Don’t be afraid to let loose and say whatever dirty things come to mind. Also do not be afraid to stimulate yourself to orgasm if need be, to keep the fantasy going in your head. If you need to finger your clit or squeeze your breast, do so. Be uninhibited. After all, you’re having sex with a lover NOT your husband. For the husband, knowing your wife is actually fantasizing about another man while you do her can be VERY HOT! Enjoy seeing her as she would be with “him”.

9. Afterwards - no questions and NO talking! Ladies – let him see you “spent” on the bed, as you would be after being fucked by another man. Or consider masturbating to one last orgasm, thinking of a second fuck by your lover (trust me your husband will not be able to leave until you finish). Husbands – It’s simple: just finish and leave! Go to another room and dress. Your wife will dress and follow later. That way she doesn't remove her blindfold and see you, which would destroy the illusion that she just had sex someone else.

10. For some women the hardest part is getting comfortable with the idea of a fantasy of another man having sex with her. This is a learned thing, but very enjoyable once they are able to get into it. Practice makes perfect. The first time may seem odd. TRY it again and it will be better. After a few times you will begin to enjoy it.

Tip – If you can’t already tell, the Blind Date is ALL ABOUT THE WIFE! It’s her fantasy scene, and her imaginary (or past/future) lover. What she wears, the position she chooses to be “taken” in, etc. must all match the fantasy she is imagining at that moment. She is in control of her fantasy. The husband is there just to “fill in” for the fantasy lover during intercourse.

Typical scene – The husband goes to the living room, and starts the countdown for a predetermined time (20-30 min). The wife goes the bedroom, puts on a sheer nightie (or gets nude), puts in her earplugs and blindfolds herself.

Then she lies back on the bed and begins to push away all thoughts of her husband. She imagines herself with her fantasy lover. She massages her breasts as he would, tugging at her nipples, rubbing her body as her lover would. As she warms up she moves her hands lower, along her stomach, rubbing her legs and her thighs, using the complete darkness and silence to block out any thoughts other than the man she most wants to be with. Her fingers find her slit and she begins to stroke herself as she imagines (and wishes!) her lover would do. She may reach an orgasm like this, or not, depending on what she prefers. As the time for fucking gets closer she should assume whichever position she fantasizes being in when her “lover” enters her (missionary, doggy on edge of bed, etc.). She should continue to masturbate and stimulate herself while she waits.

After the agreed time the husband silently comes in the room. The wife has no idea he is there. He may even watch her for a minute. Then he touches her a little (not too much). Rubbing her breasts, fingering her, etc. She will have no idea he is there until she's touched. The wife instantly assimilates his touch into her fantasy. In her mind it MUST BE her fantasy lover who is touching her. The husband takes just enough time to help her complete the “foreplay” part of her fantasy, and then advances the fantasy by entering her and completing the act, while the wife imagines it is her fantasy lover inside her. The wife may want to call out her lover’s name, or tell him what she wants. Doing this cements the illusion in the woman’s mind and helps her “believe” that her fantasy is reality.

After intercourse, the husband withdraws and leaves immediately. There is no talking or further intimacy. The wife might lay there and enjoy the afterglow as she comes down from the erotic high. When she removes her blindfold and earplugs she is completely alone, and the fantasy of being with another man is intact. She then gets dressed and rejoins her husband.

At that point some couples prefer to act as if nothing happened. I
f so, then it’s important that they ignore what just happened. No discussion and no questions at that time (later is fine). Doing so immediately will detract from the appeal of the fantasy. Others like to take this opportunity to move into another phase of fantasy, where the wife has just returned to her husband after the illusion of having a sexual tryst with another man, leading to additional sexual fantasies. It's whatever works for you.

Try it. If you don't like it, try it again. If after three times you don't like it, then you're probably reading the wrong blog.